Gloves, Lipstick and High Heels

Every night I thank God for the ability to accessorize

By Elizabeth Hemmerdinger                                                                       

I don’t think anyone has the right to objectify the stuff of womanhood, of my womanhood, anyway. After all, we work hard to earn our accessories. We raise the roof, and the kids. We launder, we cook, we chauffeur and garden and keep the family records and pay the bills and then we go to work. Mostly, we choose our stuff carefully, worry over each item we purchase, and then cherish our choices, even our household appliances.

We — women, that is — grease the wheels of Retail. Oh, sure, men shop. But it’s “Slam, bam, thank-you, ma'am,” for all the ones I know. No, wait, there’s Rob, a self-described metrosexual. He has pastel cashmere sweaters to match his socks. And his Vespa. Surely we can count him one of us. Most of the commerce of this country, probably of most of the free world, is carried on by women.

Just watch what happens now that we are all scared to death by the much trumpeted demise of our financial markets, banks, lending cycles, paychecks, security both personal and national. Even if we have a few dollars in whatever banks remain standing by Christmas, we’re going to cut way, way back on our shopping. It’s the right response to this crisis. But the material gods will slumber restlessly. They need us working the system.

So I take great umbrage when any symbol I cherish is cheapened, dragged into the mire of the political arena. Think what damage Michael Dukakis did to the aviator’s cap. Ruined! I’ve had to relegate my beloved brown leather “Snoopy” chapeau to a dark corner of the closet. Except on the very coldest days. And I will NEVER buy another one.

I’m not picking on any political party here, or speaking up for a favorite candidate, I just think, for the sake of retail stability, all of them should keep their mitts off my gloves.

Elizabeth Hemmerdinger is a born-and-bred New Yorker as well as an award-winning playwright and screenwriter. She is the founder of “Behind The Scenes at Tisch,” a program dedicated to developing new works by new writers at New York University, where she received her MFA in 2003. Her plays have been presented in a number of venues in New York and Los Angeles as well as at the Williamstown Theater Festival and The Denver Center. Her full length piece Squall is available through Playscripts, Inc., which is also publishing a volume of her short works this fall. She is currently working with Larry Gatlin on a musical about Rosie the Riveter. Hemmerdinger is a founding board member of Dancing Dreams, a program specially designed for children with physical challenges that focuses on establishing an environment where children, aided by a teenage volunteer, participate in the art of dance, giving them the chance to experience the pure joy of movement. She is affectionately known as “Grambo” to her five delicious grandchildren.

Tweet